Just like his wife—who might be called Mom, Mama, Mẹ, Má, or Mẫu—he, too, goes by many names: Dad, Daddy, Papa, Ba, Bố, Tía, Thầy, or Cậu. No matter the name, he is that one irreplaceable figure whose presence gives true meaning to the sacred union of marriage.
Without him, the bond between husband and wife lacks its fullness. It no longer reflects a natural, traditional, moral, and ethical partnership between a man and a woman. Without the presence of a father, marriage also loses its role as the cornerstone of family and society.
Father’s Day is a time for children to express love, appreciation, and deep gratitude to this man.
Unlike the word “Hiền Mẫu” (gentle mother), which naturally evokes warmth in the mother-child bond, the term “Hiền Phụ” (gentle father) doesn’t always land as easily. That’s because children often don’t see their dads as “gentle.” To them, Dad is the strict one—the one with the rules, the discipline, the stern face.
“A mother’s love is felt from the moment we are born.
A father’s love is only fully understood when we become fathers ourselves.”
This saying beautifully captures who a father truly is—and the kind of quiet, enduring love and protection he provides for his children and family.
Let’s set aside the negative portrayals of some men—those who gamble, drink excessively, are unfaithful, or are irresponsible and domineering. Instead, let’s acknowledge a simple truth: every child comes into this world because of a father. A child’s life is supported, sheltered, and nurtured—often by the sweat, tears, and silent sacrifices of their dad. Even if he’s seen as serious, distant, or gruff, when we reflect on him, most of us realize our father was:
Loving in Action, Not Just Words
His love wasn’t always spoken. That’s why many children mistakenly think their fathers didn’t love them. But his love was expressed through actions—sleepless nights, hard labor, firm discipline. When he corrected us, it wasn’t from anger but from a desire for us to learn and grow. A good father isn’t just a protector—he’s also a mentor and friend, teaching lessons the world never could.
A Devoted Husband
A man who loves his children is usually a faithful and loving husband. His loyalty and respect for their mother set the standard for the entire household.
Honest and Upright
Dad had no reason to lie—unless he had forgotten his love for his family. “Say what you mean, and do what you say.” That’s the lesson many of us remember, especially when he made a promise—he kept it.
Quietly Strong
Compared to Mom, Dad didn’t say much. He often kept silent during arguments, letting things pass. Ironically, many sons (and even daughters) later strive to emulate that quiet strength in handling family conflicts.
Hardworking and Reliable
He was the pillar of the home. While today’s women contribute significantly to the family’s finances and society, the ultimate responsibility for securing the family’s well-being often still rests on Dad’s shoulders. He brought home the food, paid the bills, and never asked for praise.
Protective of the Family’s Future
As the Vietnamese proverb goes: “A child without a father is like a house without a roof.” Even in today’s modern world, that wisdom rings true. Dad’s deepest worries weren’t just about money. He stayed up at night, wondering about our future, hoping we’d be okay. We usually don’t understand those worries—until we become parents ourselves.
Open-Hearted and Generous
Behind his tough exterior was often a man with a broad, forgiving soul. His perspective was often long-term. He taught us to laugh, even when life was unfair. It was Dad who reminded us that a sense of humor is essential for survival.
Always There When Needed
Sure, Mom sewed our clothes and made our meals. But Dad taught us how to ride a bike, mow the lawn, fix a leak, or drive a car. He was always there when we needed help with school or life. Many of us only begin to realize how much he carried when we ourselves reach middle age and think, “How did Dad handle all this back then?”
A Motivator Without Words
He may not have said much, but his gaze, his posture, and his decisions told us: “You can do more. Dream bigger.” He often saw the potential in us before we saw it in ourselves. He helped us distinguish between what we wanted and what we truly needed. That wisdom grounded us in reality.
Someone We’re Proud Of
Even if he never cared much for praise, we carry his pride in our hearts. He lives on in us—his children. As the Bible says in Sirach 30:4, “When the father dies, it is as though he is not dead, for he leaves behind children just like himself.” Unfortunately, many only realize how much they loved and respected their father once he’s gone.
In short, if a mother’s love flows like a gentle spring, then a father’s love stands tall like Mount Tai—steadfast, enduring, and often silent. If Mom provided the food and clothes, Dad taught us their value through his labor. If Mom cushioned our falls, Dad taught us how to rise after each stumble. If Mom guided us through life’s precious lessons, Dad taught us to learn from our mistakes. If Mom cared for us, Dad taught us to care for ourselves. If Mom supported our first steps, Dad showed us how to walk confidently into the world.
Yes, his mannerisms, words, or strict ways may not have always aligned with our emotions, but they laid the foundation for our strength, independence, and growth.
How We See Dad Over the Years:
- Age 4: “My dad can do anything!”
- Age 5: “My dad knows a lot.”
- Age 6: “My dad knows more than your dad!”
- Age 8: “Dad doesn’t know everything…”
- Age 10: “Dad’s changed.”
- Age 12: “Dad doesn’t know anything! He’s too old to understand.”
- Age 14: “Dad’s out of touch. Why even listen to him?”
- Age 21: “Dad’s so outdated. He doesn’t get it.”
- Age 25: “He’s old. He probably doesn’t know much about this.”
- Age 30: “Dad has a lot of experience. I should ask him.”
- Age 35: “Let me talk to Dad first.”
- Age 40: “This is hard—how did Dad handle things like this?”
- Age 50: “Dad’s gone… I wish I had understood him better. There’s so much I could’ve learned.”
On Father’s Day 2025, let us honor our dads with respect, gratitude, and the heartfelt love of devoted children. If your father is still with you, take his hand, look into his eyes, and say:
“Dad, I love you.”
And more importantly—live your life in a way that, even in death, he would smile with pride.
-Trần Mỹ Duyệt, Ph D in Psychology-